For The Love Of All Our Children

Here was the scene in our home today, Nathanael's first day in his forever home.

Hooray For Lisa

Lisa Xi was our Holt staff person in Nanchang. She was tremendous and cannot be paid enough for all the wonderful work she did.

From what I could tell, she did it all. She took care of our adoption related paperwork, got us to our appointments in a timely fashion often first in the door, scheduled our Nanchang outings, helped us with our crying children, and was the most supportive, caring, and compassionate person I've had the opportunity to meet in a long time.

She loved our little Nathanael and said she was going to miss him. When we got off the bus at the hotel, only two hours before we got Nathanael, she commented how he looked like Jennifer. "Oh, your little boy, he's so cute. He runs and he jumps and he climbs." She always took the time to talk directly to him in Mandarin whenever she saw him. He loved her as much as she loved him.

People like Lisa make your trip a wonderful one.

Our Adoption Group

Here are pics of the some of the families and children we had the pleasure of traveling with.

Guangzhou Pics

Guangzhou was a marvelous city. While there we stayed at the White Swan Hotel, a queen among the world's hotels. We visited the pearl and jade markets. I grabbed a taxi and went to the electronics markets and only purchased a nice Casio watch (a $150 watch which I got for the equivalent of about $85). Also, my taxi ride amounted to $4 for a 3o minute round trip!

The pictures are of the hotel swimming pool and of Guangzhou's city skyline at night. We took a nighttime riverboat ride up the Pearl river. Some of these nighttime pics are blurry, but they still give a good idea of what it was like.

Of all the cities I've ever been to, I have to say that Guangzhou ranks up there among the most majestic I've ever seen.

In case you've never heard of Guangzhou, you may know it better by its European name, Canton. It is the place where the most popular Chinese food in America comes from. Cantonese food. The city is 2200 years old and is China's food capital. The saying in China goes, "Eat it in Guangzhou," which is a testament to its culinary fame.

HOME

Be careful what you pray for, you just might get it.

On the way to Nanchang I prayed my way through most of the flight. I prayed that we and the other families with us would have a wonderful day meeting our new children and that all would transition well.

I feel that God answered my prayers as I hoped he would.

On our last day in Guangzhou, I again found myself praying rather fervently, that travel home would go smoothly.

A lot is usually said about flying the long flight home with your new child. I wasn't worried about that so much as about our arrangements in general. We had about three flights home, from Guangzhou to Hong Kong, Hong Kong to Chicago, and Chicago to Madison. Between these two flights there was only about two hours of lee way. Essentially, if one flight got delayed, especially one of the earlier flights, it could be very costly.

So my prayers were for no delays, plain and simple.

The flight to Hong Kong boarded early and arrived about ten minutes early. The flight to Chicago left on time and landed about 10 minutes early. The flight to Madison boarded on time and landed 20 minutes early.

The prayer of a righteous man availeth much, James wrote.

Nathanael was relatively easy on the flights too, although he did not sleep well and when he saw he was taking a third flight, he was a little cranky, but he's OK.

Once we got home, we were all tired and we all did not sleep. Hee hee. Call it jet lag, but it was a long night.

Today was Nathanael's first full day in his forever family and home. His big brother and sisters have been doting on him and have treated him so remarkably well. They have been waiting for this day just as long as all of us. They were great. We loved seeing them again. Little Emily, who is no longer the littlest, said to me: I don't want you to be gone for another fourteen weeks, Daddy.

14 days, little one.

I know, she said, but it felt like 14 weeks.

Yup. I know the feeling.

It's GREAT to be HOME again.

Dan

Apologies

Well, we're in Guangzhou, which is a good thing.

It's much more interesting than Nanchang and, thankfully, it's the last phase of our trip.

But, tech issues continue to baffle me here. The computers don't have USB ports or card readers so...no pictures. I can't put up any pictures until we get back, which is Thursday.

But at least we are headed back soon. I only learned of my mom's hospitalization today. Thankfully it sounds as if she will be released soon.

We baptized Nathanael today. We got video and pics of that. He seems to be doing quite well the past few days. He had a pretty happy day today.

All that's left is finishing up Nathanael's paperwork and visa. We take the citizenship oath on his behalf on Tuesday and Wednesday morning (Tues. night CST), the airplane voyage begins.

Pray for us and for mom.

Pastor T.

More Nanchang Pics

A Real Chinese Village

On Wednesday, we traveled about and hour and a half outside of Nanchang to a real Chinese village. It was a rough ride on the back roads, but it was an enjoyable trip. Here are some of the pics.

Our Brave Little Soldier

Thursday was a difficult day for all of us. For one thing, we really need to leave Nanchang. We've been here since Sunday and we've seen every corner of the hotel...twice.

But yesterday was hard also as Nathanael really started grieving yesterday. On Sunday, his grief came out in anger. Yesterday was different.

He did not sleep well Wednesday night. During the day, he was restless an uncooperative. After supper, however, was when we saw what was really happening.

The game plan after supper was to take him to the pool. He loves the pool and water in general. But we weren't back to the room very long and Nathanael got very quiet and still. His eyes got red and tears started streaming down his face. He did not want to cry, but he couldn't stop it.

It wasn't the loud cries of an angry or frustrated child. It was the quiet tears of real personal grief. For all of his motion and energy, he just sat in Jennifer's lap quietly crying for 35 minutes. Eventually he climbed down, no longer crying, but still quite subdued. He climbed up in the bed with me, laid next to me with his head on my shoulder. I sang to him and, after about 20 minutes he finally fell asleep.

Imagine. He's 2 1/2. He's with people he's only beginning to get to know. He's about to leave his hometown today. His world is upside down.

For all of his rambunctiousness, I couldn't help but admire him. Those tears are the same tears I see so many people deny themselves of. Sometimes people need to cry like that. They are the quiet tears of grief. Life carries with it its losses. Those who take a cavalier attitude toward personal loss are only setting themselves up for more problems down the road. One person I had the privilege of serving in my first parish once said to me, "There's something deeply wrong with a person who cannot or will not cry." I agree.

Nathanael's tears stirred me very deeply. He needed to do that. Today we leave his hometown and we do not know if or when we will return. I admire him so much right now. He's our brave little soldier.

Today he's a different kid, as happy as he was on Monday and Tuesday. He's helping us pack and he's going to get his last trip to the pool in a little while. Later today we fly to Guangzhou for the last phase of the trip. The change in scenery can't come fast enough.

What We're Learning About Nathanael

Nathanael was given one advantage over many of the other children who were adopted in our group. He was given a foster home.





This was probably because of his club feet. He was raised by a foster mother who did a magnificent job. Here is the evidence.





He does not act like his feet are limitations. Nevertheless, he is careful enough to look at what is front of him when he walks. He sees uneven floor or terrain as a challenge, not as a problem.





He often picks up after himself. He is potty trained and has had no accidents as a result of the trauma. He throws things away on his own. He knows to wash his hands after using the toilet.





And he's only 2 2/3 years old!





He speaks a lot in Chinese. Lisa, our Holt escort, says he has a remarkable vocabulary for such a young age. Likely, his foster mother, talked directly to him a lot.





Other things about him:


He is full of energy and just trucks when he is moving around. He runs, jumps, climbs, and kicks. We'll be chasing him down for the next 16 years.





He likes to draw. He likes challenging toys like puzzle toys. He likes TV.





He slurps his noodles! :) Very cute to watch.





He is already learning English and testing his boundaries with these new people. He knows "Mama" "Dada" "No" "Good job" "Oopsie" "Uh Oh" and is close to knowing "potty."





He absolutely loves water. He splashes in the tub and laughs when you wash his hair. Bath time is very exciting for Nathanael. Today we'll try the pool.





He does NOT like animals. We brought a Blues Clues shirt with a picture of Blue on it and he won't wear it. That will have to change. Peaches, Elly, and Daisy will appreciate it if he gets to know them better.

And I'm sure we'll be learning more.

Nanchang Tuesday

Tuesday morning we went to the People's Park in the heart of Nanchang. It is Nanchang's version of Central Park.

Some little tidbits: Nanchang is no small city, although by Chinese standards it is. Nanchang is 1.2 million people. It was founded in 200 BC. It is also an important city in Mao's Cultural Revolution.

1.2 million, for Wisconsinites, is more than just about all the major cities in Wisconsin added together.

Here's pictures from the park. One of the pictures is of me moving a chess piece from a life sized Chinese chess board in the middle of the park.

Gotcha Day, Part Two

Nathanael's napping right now, which gives me a little time to tell you the whole story of Gotcha day. It's pretty neat.

When we arrived at the Civil Affairs Office, where the children are handed over, another little van pulled up with children in it. As we were entering the tall building, we recognized Nathanael. His caregiver was taking him into an elevator to take him up to the 26th floor where the office was. Jennifer grabbed my hand and ran into the elevator.

On the ride up, he saw us smiling at him and talking to him. He didn't know that we would be holding him within five minutes. His caregiver had it figured out, though. One of the people with us jokingly accused us of "cheating." It was really neat.

Jennifer got to hold him first while I took pictures. Then she handed him to me. He had a small tear in his left eye, probably frightened. But he never really got upset. He was dead weight, very limp, as we held him. I held him for the remainder of the time and on the bus back to the hotel. I sang to him and, on the bus, found a way to win his trust.

Mindy, one of the other moms, had handed me a small, kid-sized, bag of plain M&Ms. Chocolate, it seems, is a universal language. One by one, I handed him the little pieces and, one by one, he gladly took them.

Back in the hotel room, Jennifer got out the magna doodle and let him draw on it. Drawing, it turns out, is one of his favorite activities. Here are some of the pics of the M&Ms and the drawing.

What A Difference A Day Makes

If Nathanael looked a little distressed in those pictures, it's because he was. Imagine having your world shaken like he did yesterday. Anyway, we had a good afternoon with him. Dan used M&Ms to gain his trust and Jennifer made great use of our magna doodle to get him playing. Everything went swimmingly until about 8:30 when he started acting more aggressive and was getting really tired. After trying to tear up a picture in his photo album, Dan took the picture away and the explosion happened. 45 minutes of uncontrollable crying...and probably grieving as well.

Finally about 9:30, he crashed into sleep and slept solidly until the next morning.

Here's what today looked like.

Gotcha!

Holt International calls the day you get your child, "Gotcha Day!" Here's what that day looks like.

Beijing 2008

My apologies for the bad quality of these pics. I post them so you get some idea of the work that's being done here for the Olympics. The pics posted are of a tennis stadium and of the "Bird's Nest" where the ceremonies for next year's Olympics will be held. They were taken out our bus window as we drove by and the rain makes them more than a little blurry.

Today its Tiananmen Square, Temple of Heaven, and part of the Forbidden City.

Blessings,

Dan

Ride My Rickshaw

To badly misquote a Moody Blues tune "Ride My See Saw."

The rickshaw ride is a Beijing must-do, although it isn't for the faint-of-heart as Beijing traffic is, well, "controlled chaos." Lane lines are optional and buses, vans, cars, bikes, and people all seem to share the roads in a system that would make Manhatten look positively sane.

Nevertheless, Jennifer and laughed in the face of danger and had a blast. We also visited a real Chinese Hutong (a four family building complex) and saw the real Beijing by doing so.

Enjoy the pics.